However, I saw Elaine’s Instagram update and saw a picture of her by the beach. The two figures in the distance were impossibly familiar to me.
Cameron and Ian had rejected my invitation and hid the fact that they were accompanying Elaine to the beach for a holiday.
It was then that I felt as if someone was choking me by the neck. I drowned in the sense of betrayal and abandonment that washed over me.
My chest started heaving, and I could scarcely breathe. My nose prickled, and my tears fell uncontrollably.
From that day onward, the world that once consisted of the three of us became the four of us, and I was the odd one out who went unnoticed.
I also started realizing that the feelings and relationships I once assumed to be unshakable were actually rather flimsy.
The impending sense of failure felt like a noose that slowly circled around my heart, messing up my thoughts and my emotions. Time and time again, the feeling of being overlooked and cast aside drained me.
Still, relationships were like a worn sweater. Even if you no longer planned on wearing it, you couldn’t bear to part with it either.
But now, I was forced to face reality. I couldn’t continue avoiding it any longer.
I got myself discharged from the hospital without letting them know about it. I went back to my apartment alone and packed up all my things.
When I saw the photo of the tree of us standing under the oak tree at the orphanage, I couldn’t resist laughing self-deprecatingly.
What was the point of keeping these things around when the people in the photos had all changed? I opened up the large photo album and tossed all of the photos into the fire.
All along, I kept the old love letters Cameron and Ian had written to me in the deepest corner of my drawer. Even though I couldn’t give them an answer, I didn’t want to ruin our relationship either.
Perhaps I had once felt something for Ian, but now, that feeling was completely gone. I set fire to every trace of our past and watched as the letters and photos went up in flames.
As I took one last look around the empty apartment, I felt as if I could see them sitting on the couch and smiling at me.
But I knew that at the very next second, Elaine would show up too. She was like a nightmare that haunted me.
While riding a cab to the airport, I sent Cameron and Ian a message.
“The game has officially begun. If you fail to find me, I’ll vanish for good.”
Soon after that, I got a call from Ian, but I rejected it. I tossed the SIM card out the window to be crushed under the wheels of the passing cars.
