Chapter S
Just as I put my hands on the bed to push myself off the floor, Thane sweeps under my legs and I quickly slide my arm around his neck, causing my fingers to brush through the hair at the base of his neck, eliciting a shiver out of him. He gently places me in the bed and we lock eyes with each other, our noses almost touching. He looks down at my lips and then quickly clears his throat once I lick my own and he steps back covering me up as he does. He pulls the table around and gives me my notepad and pencil. “I will let Eric know that you are ready for a meal and have him talk to you about his treatment plan. In the meantime, I can call your pack and let them know you have been found and getting care. Can you tell me who your pack is so we can find your family?” I frown at him. Hurt flashing across my face before I see flashes of my sister running, my mother screaming while being attacked by shifters. Me desperately thrashing, trying to get away. My father nowhere in sight. He must register the pain on my face because he whispers “I’m sorry” before I can nod “no.” And I see hurt flashing across his face as well.
We share a moment of silence just holding each other’s gaze before we’re interrupted by a female shifter and the healer. I stiffen and start to scoot further back in the bed, anticipating punishment from Eric for hiding and making a scene, but to my surprise they both smile at me and start talking as if nothing happened. “Food will be here shortly and I would like to get another blood sample before she eats if that’s okay.” Thane turns his head from Eric to me and I suddenly realize he’s waiting for my answer, not telling me what I have to do. Giving me a choice. I look between the three of them and nod my head in agreement. “I’m going to head back to the pack house and get caught up on some work, but I can stay if you want me to. I want to do what makes you comfortable, but I also trust you here with Eric and his team. I swear on my life, he will take good care of you. They all will. We want you better, we need your help, and we want to help you. No strings attached. My team and I have been tracking and rescuing trafficked shifters. You aren’t alone anymore.”
Not alone anymore. Those words sound so amazing, but also so unreal. I haven’t allowed myself to feel hopeful in years. The thought of not being alone never registering, never on my radar as a possibility, but here in this room, he’s offering it to me. I pick up the pad of paper and write “it’s okay to work, I feel better.” and I place it down on my lap; catching myself staring at the words in shock I even feel this way. I look back at Thane and he’s smiling at me. I’m proud of the steps you’re taking. You’re doing good little wolf. His praise causing me to blush and quickly look away. He chuckles to himself “Alright, I will be checking in with Eric on your progress. We will talk more when you’re up for it.” And he nods at me and he exits the room. The smell of pine and earth lingering in the air. I inhale deeply trying to get as much as it as I can.
A few pokes later I finally get to eat and the hottest bowl of chicken soup was brought in on a tray with bread and I’m salivating. The smell is divine and I can’t remember how long it’s been since I touched hot food, let alone anything that tasted good. They let me have two bowls before I had to quit. I admit, I was a little nauseated like they warned me of when I was inhaling my soup, but it was worth it. The fact that I remained calm during the blood draw is a miracle. The amount of interaction I’ve had to do has exhausted me, but the fact all of my interactions have been pleasant and nobody has hurt me in anyway has me feeling shocked. Almost like a state of denial that this safety could be real.
I get up and slowly shuffle myself to the bathroom. Turning on the light I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I’m surprised to see what I look like now. I ve definitely aged. My hair a duli white, my eyes tired and heavy. A scabbed over cut on my forehead and several yellow, fading bruises. I stare deep into my eyes. Begging and pleading to catch a glimpse of my wolf. “Aramana if you’re there, I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you were forced away. I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you.” I feel utterly gutted at that thought. I should bring crying, I want to, but nothing comes out. I just stand there, staring at my reflection, waiting for something. Anything. Nothing.
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