Chapter 4: Moving Forward
Christmas Day passed with my mother’s constant nagging–complaining about my lack of a job one minute, my lack of a boyfriend the next, never missing a chance to compare me to Jake.
“Look at jake. You’ve never measured up to him since you were kids, and now the gap between you is even worse.”
The most unbearable part was that everything she said was true.
Jake’s startup company was booming, Olivia Bennett was a young star editor at a famous magazine, and their future looked blindingly bright.
Meanwhile, I had accomplished nothing. We seemed to be growing further apart, destined to live in different worlds.
By evening, I couldn’t take it anymore and got into a huge fight with my mom. I went straight to the airport and bought a ticket on the next flight back to New York.
As soon as my plane landed, Jake called.
“Your mom said you went back. Why didn’t you wait for me? We could have flown together.”
“…Couldn’t write at home. Came back to finish my deadline.”
In reality, I couldn’t write anywhere right now.
Jake saw through me immediately: “You fought with your mom again, didn’t you? She just wants you to settle down. Don’t argue with her so much. Hey, I got you a present too–I’ll give it to you when I get back.”
The day after New Year’s, Jake returned and immediately texted me.
“Dinner tonight? I’ll give you your gift.”
Jake bought me presents every Christmas, Since sophomore year when he started
making money from stock trading, his gifts were always things I loved but couldn’t afford myself.
In the past, I’d accepted them without thinking twice, but this time I refused. “…I don’t want it, Jake. Don’t buy me things anymore.”
Jake sounded confused: “What? Why not?”
I stared at the floor: “You have a girlfriend now. Buying expensive gifts for another
1/3
woman might make her uncomfortable.”
Though I loved Jake, he had someone he loved now, and I genuinely wished them
happiness.
I didn’t have anything against Olivia. If not her, it would have been someone else.
It just would never be me.
“It’s fine,” Jake said, his tone lightening. “She knows. Olivia’s not the jealous type.”
“Tonight at seven, usual place. Gotta go, meeting starting.”
After hanging up, I felt a bitterness spreading through my chest like sour juice. Sometimes I hated Jake for being so nice to me. I wished he’d be a little worse, so I
wouldn’t love him so much.
Of course Olivia didn’t mind. Jake didn’t have feelings for me, so he didn’t need to
hide anything. She knew I’d never be a threat to her.
We weren’t rivals for his affection.
I never even qualified to be her rival.
Jake didn’t give me a chance to refuse, so after work, I went to our regular
restaurant.
To my surprise, I saw three people at the table.
Olivia was there, along with a man I didn’t recognize. He wore a black turtleneck
that hugged his athletic build, with movie–star good looks.
I froze, and Jake waved me over.
“Over here!”
As soon as I sat down, he started introducing the man: “This is my friend, Alex
Knight. MIT grad, runs his own tech company now.”
Before I could figure out why he was giving such a detailed introduction, Jake
mouthed silently to me:
“Single.”
